Christmas Card!

Yesterday, when the mail came, there was what was obviously a Christmas card - red envelope and all.

This one was different. The address took up the whole envelope, which was about 5" x 7". It was printed in pencil, and on three lines - literally. Three lines drawn - probably using  a ruler - across the envelope itself.

The stamp covered part of the adressee information. It was addressed to "Grandma Donna & [this part covered] Grandpa Marc." My heart skipped a beat.

The back had the return address of Mikey's school - 

Over the message on the inside were two more lines: "To Grandma Donna & Grandpa Marc." And under the message, two more ruler-drawn lines:

Love

Mikey

I cried.

A couple of random ....

Mikey continues to eat. For a snack, he ate: popcorn, pretzels (more on this), a mandarin orange, and pecans.

The pretzels were in a wooden bowl. There was also a new jar of peanut butter on the table. Turned my back for a few minutes, to find that Mikey had:

• Opened the peanut butter (I buy "natural" which separates)
• Poured the peanut oil onto the pretzels
• Was eating the pretzels (and peanut oil - yuck) with a spoon!!

(FYI he later had an enchilada plate AND a bean and cheese burrito, plus some cheese quesadilla I made, and an ice cream drumstick, for dinner.)

The boys help us with recycling. We take glass bottles, plastic containers and cans to a recycle center. They have to help us separate the cans and plastic into large bins, and the glass has to be sorted further into colors. The sorted materials are taken to the scale and weighed; our id is checked and we get a voucher for the material. We go to the cashier to get the cash. The boys then get a share.

Both boys have banks at our house; David has spent a lot of his (and Mikey almost none). Today David asked to go to the Japanese marketplace (indoors; we've had rain for days now). Grandpa asked if he planned to buy anything. He decided to take his money with him. I have it on good authority that he bought something for Mom. (Can't say what - she reads the blog ;-).

created by Pacman

Michael is on the computer - during the course of his e-travels he often repeats and/or modifies things he hears/sees. He just declared that "David [his brother] is produced by Pacman." Who knew??

Chinese Food

David has been expanding his culinary experimentation. (With Mom's help of course.) Last night, we decided to bring in Chinese. We asked Mikey what he wanted, and go the usual, "orange chicken and noodle" response.

David thought about it for a minute and declared he wanted, "pot holders." Grandpa - who had asked the question - looked very confused and was momentarily speechless (!!!). Grandma to the rescue:  "I  think he means pot STICKERS, sweetie."

*chortle chortle* %snort%

Just a quick one

Last August, we took a vacation; I was gone for almost 2 weeks. I got this email from David:

Subject: i miss you.
Body: That is all.

It's been a while ...

... since I posted anything. How time funs when you're having a good fly!

To back up a little...

Birthday Party

We hosted the usual birthday bash for the boys this year, with the usual bounce house and Baja Fresh. This year, the boys' other grandparents were able to make it to the party. We got together and got them new portable game consoles - Mom did the actual shopping; we got off easy by writing checks. Their actual birthday was Friday, and I was there when they opened them.

David always has a list of things he wants - and they are starting in TRUE teenage fashion to be EXPENSIVE things, so he didn't get everything on his list.

When we asked Mikey what he wanted for his birthday, he said, "Foxy." (Foxy is Aunt Evie's dog.) Well, we couldn't give him Foxy on his birthday because Labrador retrievers with nice big claws are not compatible with plastic-based bounce houses. So we had Foxy over the week before. And Mikey got in all his play time then.

The day was absolutely gorgeous. And the folks who showed up all had a nice, pleasant times with the boys and with each other. Even clean up and put away (of the bounce house) seemed to go very well this year. I guess the stars were aligned.

Disneyland, Disneyland and more Disneyland

We have passes to Disneyland. And we have taken full advantage of them. When I say, "We" I mean primarily Mom, the boys and I. (Grandpa and I have made it over there together once or twice.) The four of us have gone together, and I've taken Mikey separately - and don't remember but think I took David one day, too. Mom has been able to take David on days when Mikey is in school.

David has been getting bolder. He finally went on the Haunted House, and has tried several other rides that used to scare him, including at least one roller coaster - this is terrific progress!

Mikey is interesting. He focuses on a couple of rides at a time, and rides them over and over and over again. Most recently, that has been Pirates of the Carribean. So each time we go, we ride it 3-5 times.

One of those times, he looked at me and said, "Blue Bayou." For those of you who have never been to D'Land, the Blue Bayou restaurant is probably the finest dining establishment in the park. It is inside the ride area, and forms a part of the Louisiana bayou atmosphere. It is a sit-down restaurant, and unless you've reserved a table 3 weeks in advance, you are unlikely to be seated in the summer.

However, Grandma gave in and checked on it for lunch. We had to wait about 5 minutes but we got seated. I did tell Mikey this was a "nice" restaurant and he had to use his manners. He behaved very well. Service is not fast, but they did bring bread fairly quickly - they brought four good-sized pieces of bread - I had one and Mikey had three BUT he used his knife and napkin. He mostly used his fork with the salad and he used his utensils with his main meal. That took quite a while to arrive. I took the precaution of handing the waiter my Disney pass (for the discount) and credit card, and asked him to ring us up right away. Which was a good thing. Mikey was very good throughout the meal, and with a little coaxing, waited for me to finish (oh and he at half of my Monte Cristo along with his own lunch, including the asparagus!) But when we were done - he was ready to go.

We had one minor incident on the way out - Mikey got hiccoughs and decided he needed water. So he grabbed a water glass on a table where people were sitting!  They looked startled; I apologized and I think they saw that Mikey had special needs ... they were very nice and said not to worry about it.

Will try to catch up more soon.

What IS it with soap, anyway?

For various reasons, and because I'm not currently deployed on a contract, I've been providing some extra help with the boys over the last couple of weeks. I was at their house - Mikey was already at school - and David was getting ready to go somewhere.

"Go to the bathroom, then wash your hands AND face," I told him.

About 30 seconds later, he was back out. "David," I said, "Go back and wash your face WITH SOAP!"

With body language and stomping indicating exactly what he thought of this, David stormed back into the bathroom, muttering on the way, "What IS it with soap, anyway? It gets in your EYES."

What do you want for your birthday, Mikey?

Last week we asked Mikey what he wanted for his birthday. He responded, "Presents!" (DUH! on us, I guess...) We did try to press him for something more ... descriptive. He finally said, "Foxy."

Foxy is Aunt Evie's dog - she's a chocolate Labrador retriever. We are planning to have the bounce house for the birthday, and dog claws and bounce house material are not - compatible. So we asked Aunt Evie to come over a week ahead of time, with Foxy. (Foxy lives in the condo - she has a small side patio but no yard and she loves Grandma's yard.)

So Foxy came over mid-day, and she chased Mikey all around the yard. I did some bubbles, but neither the dog nor the boy were interested. (However, David came out and chased bubbles for a good half hour!) We did get him to throw the ball to her a bit - she retrieves (she's a retriever, remember?) and you have to tell her to "Drop it" or she keeps the ball (or whatever) in her mouth.

Foxy loves water - later we got out squirt guns. The boys actually squirted each other - then both of them squirted the dog. The dog - who loves water - did not like this, so we stopped. Except David, who is hesitant around the dog, did use the squirt gun not to squirt her, but to get her to leave him alone.

Mikey went inside for a while to play on the computer, and came back out later. However, he had tired the dog out ... so they didn't play too much. We did try to get Foxy to give Mikey kisses before she left; Mikey would put his face forward but shy away and giggle before the actual kiss took place ...

We think he enjoyed his early present.

Evil Mistress of Math

• Point 1: When I am David's math teacher, I often refer to myself as "Mrs. F--, the Evil Mistress of Math." David is amused.
• Point 2: David, like many teens, does not like to concentrate on things which don't amuse him.
• Point 3: Sometimes, the math concepts take concentration.

This week, we finally hit a topic that required a little thinking. David was just not into it. He got very emotional. When he does this, I get quieter and "flatter" in my voice. David declared that the " ... pie pieces make you eviler and EMOTIONLESS." I suppose that was geared to get a rise out of me; I merely agreed in a quiet, flat voice. It did calm him down, when he realized that all the fussing was not going to convince me to stop the lesson.

I'm not sure in what order this happened, but ... he also semi-yelled, "Bad Job, David!" when he didn't get something right away. I guess he didn't get what he wanted from me then either (likely, sympathy) - I responded in a sharp voice, "I don't allow any one else to speak to you that way; YOU may not do so, either."

Eventually, the quiet, EMOTIONLESS, continuance of the lesson won.  :-)

Fears and Age Appropriate Behavior

The boys spent the night with us this weekend. Because of elopement and other issues, we split the boys up. David generally sleeps on an air mattress in a room with Grandpa, and Mikey and I share a room with twin beds.

This post focuses on David. David is very high functioning. He is home-schooled. Most of the time, he can be reasoned with. However, he has fears that are exceptional. To spend the night at our house, he requires 2 nightlights and we had to leave the bathroom light on, with the door partially closed.

At David's house, there was a TV with some kind of short or something; it would seemingly come on of its own accord. Mom referred to it as a "TV Ghost." David does not have a TV in his room; he got semi-hysterical until Grandpa unplugged the TV.

He also - at nearly 14 - still sleeps with stuffed animals (as does Mikey).

He normally reads a bit in bed (as do I!) before finally settling down for the night. I asked him if he'd brought any books; he said, "No," so I suggested he find some from our set of books downstairs (which includes many books for kids). His reading list was interesting:

• Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom storybook
• Popeye Storybook based on the movie
• No, David
• Chicka Chicka Boom Boom

Another thing that is autism-related is a lack of empathy - based on a lack of interest - for "other people." I found a great book with pictures, geared for high schoolers, that deals with individual, discrete relationship possibilities. I shared one with David over the weekend; it spoke to noticing other people's eye contact (or lack thereof), facial expression (welcoming look? or not) to help him determine if they would welcome his joining them.

I also asked him last week - and he forgot - to notice and compliment one thing about someone - for example, Mom or Nana. We'll see how that goes - I'll send him some email reminders. Stay tuned ....

Some updates ...

Mikey

I completed a contract late in June and have nothing lined up for a while! Just as well; Mikey was on summer break. Various services for the boys have been cut back, and I was able to provide a little extra help.

During the first week, Mom had some "banked" hours she was able to use on Monday through Wednesday. On Thursday, I took Mikey to Disneyland, all by myself. This is something I've attempted only a couple of times, and only for a short amount of time. It seems to get better, especially since we establish the "rules" up front. And Mikey knows the routines better.

What's really funny with Mikey is that he has exact notions of what he wants to do on any given trip. One time, he wanted the Haunted House, which we did maybe five times. And on other trips, we have gone back-and-forth between California Adventure and Disneyland.

This trip, he did not want California Adventure at all. When I asked him what he wanted, he said (authoritatively), "Splash Mountain. Pirates. Tarzan's Treehouse. Jungle Cruise." So we went back to Splash Mountain first - and it was closed. There were attendants who told us they were still "testing" the ride and it should be open by Noon. I was very apprehensive - thought Mikey might have a melt down - but he took it rather well.

Since we were in the vicinity, I convinced him to ride the Haunted Mansion. Then we did Pirates, the Treehouse, and the Jungle Cruise. It was about 10:30 a.m.

And Mikey said, "I want home, please." !!!!
"Do you want Grandma's house?"
"No; Mama's house."

Now, this was a twist ... usually, it's hard to get him to go home. And Mom had other plans, so it wasn't really a good idea to take him home quite yet. We went on Pirates again, then walked around a bit and I finally talked him into going back to Splash Mountain, and it had reopened. He loved it. (He had not been on it before.) I then asked him if he wanted to ride Winnie the Pooh - he said, "Winnie the Pooh. Then Splash Mountain." So we did.

BTW, using the Guest Assistance pass usually means going in via the Fast Pass line. There is no Fast Pass for Pirates. Mikey said he wanted to go on Pirates again, so we went back towards the Exit, which is where you go for wheelchair access. The line was all the way out to the street! which means there were probably 80 people in the special access line - I told Mikey that Pirates was "closed" for the day - that's how he understands something is not available to him.

He then wanted to go home again; I asked him if he wanted lunch; he said, "no." I then asked if he wanted lunch in the Rainforest Cafe and he said, "YES!" I am here to report that, after a brief (< 5 minutes) period of "running around," he sat at the table with me the whole time, waited for his food, ate, etc. All in all, a terrific day!

The following day, David had a karate advancement ceremony and I took Mikey to the Santa Ana Zoo, and then he asked for Aquarium of the Pacific. We did both!!

David

We have not slowed down math. In fact, if anything, it's accelerated. He completed Algebra I and is now on to Geometry. He has completed 54 pie pieces (lessons) in 3 weeks, and aced an assessment! Now, part of this is that there is a lot of "review" presented as new material, such as finding the perimeter and area of a circle. But still, that is a lot of work to do.

David is growing UP. Literally. He is as tall as my husband and outweighs him by 25 lbs. at least. He is doing very well with his home schooling. His issues are primarily social, and he's always had an unusually broad set of fears, many of which he's learned/been taught to deal with.

And he's a teen. So, between the Teen-ness and the Austism, he doesn't really think a lot about Other People. I tasked him, last weekend, with finding one thing nice to say to someone (giving examples like, "See what Nana's wearing and compliment her if it looks nice." (Nana is his other grandma.) We'll see how he did with this assignment ...

The boys love hiking

Several earlier blogs mentioned hiking in Bolsa Chica. Clark Regional Park - which we usually call, "Ice Age Park" (it has a small and very nice museum) - is a large park. We go there frequently - there are several play areas, a pond, courts and areas for various sports; and there is usually parking, even on a busy day. Recently my hubby said, "There IS a hiking trail around the park." So we tried it.

It's a really nice, not to long "hike" that goes around the perimeter of the park - probably somewhere between a mile and a mile-and-a-half. The nice part is that it goes through trees and then across some more desert-like terrain, and goes up-and-down. Not a technical hike by any stretch, but a really nice one.

We saw bunnies and squirrels, lots of birds; and passed such exotic beasts as Golf Cart Americanus (there is a course on the other side of the trail/park at one point).

Mikey took off - he does stay "in sight." As we progressed he would yell out commands, "Forest!" and at forks in the road, "Right!" or "Left!" He even looked at the map - not sure if he "got" it or not but it sure looked like he did.

David worried a lot when Mikey got ahead; we tried to assure him that a) he didn't need to be responsible THIS time and b) it was all OK. He liked the hiking a lot too.

It was just about the right length, too; at the end, Mikey did not fuss and he did want to go back to the playground for a little while. All in all, a very good new adventure.

in Spanish

Mikey - our mystery wrapped in an enigma - will often ask for something "in Spanish" - e.g., "museum in Spanish." Last weekend, we were fixing hot dogs and hamburgers for dinner, and asked him which he wanted. "Hot dog," he said.

He followed this with: "Hot dog in Spanish."
Then he said, "Hot perro."

I was amused :-)

Unsuccessful Video Games

To listen to David talk, one would think at times he is reading from a book. He is very expressive - he just sounds like many things read. He is very - declarative - in his statements.

Video games are one of his "things." (In fact, he says he wants to be a game designer when he's older.) As with music, he has a depth of information about the topic (often more than anyone cares to know).

Today he declared that - I think I have this right - a company called CDI had made some games that were not very successful, and that they were partnered with Philips "who make screw drivers."

Just thought I'd share with the World. :-)

I Made You Use Your Bra-ain!

Last weekend, one of David's math lessons was in adding and subtracting rational expressions that had quadratic denominators that had to be factored. (Yea, yea to you non-math people.) He did fine with my coaching, but when he went to do the review, he had trouble. He asked me for an explanation.

One of David's issues is patience/attention. The problem itself was not hard; it just took a while to understand how to handle it, and then several steps to work through it. So I decided to first send him the explanation - in pieces, with the request that he read each piece thoroughly before moving one to the next piece. I started with this:

2	x	1
ab		ac

... then went on to explain factoring the divisor and the other steps in 4 other "pieces." (I even goofed and copied down wrong on Part iii and had to issue a retraction!)

At any rate, I just received this email from David:

I DID IT! i even recorded my work.

I responded with:

GOOD WORK!!!!! YEA DAVID!!!!!
[...and our standing "joke" of praise...]

I made you use your bra-ain!! Ha!!!

I'm Flying!

The boys went on their first airplane trip Tuesday. This was something in the making for a long time. For years, David was afraid to even consider riding in an airplane. Mikey had indicated he was eager to get on a plane, but you never know with Mikey. Especially with security how it is now, and all people go through to fly, and the possible delays ... well, it's been something we've thought about but not executed.

Just when I had a week scheduled off from my consulting work, JetBlue offered a promotional $9 fare (over $25 with taxes and airport fees :-) each way, to several cities. I called the boys' Mom, and asked if we could all go - she agreed. Our destination: San Francisco.

Using the formula, I wrote up a story about our special day - driving to the airport and parking; going to the gate; going through security and taking our shoes off and putting game boys into the bins for the check; going through security one-at-a-time; waiting at the gate; sitting on the plane and wearing the seatbelt. Then waiting to get off the plane; taking BART and taking a bus. We went to the Academy of Sciences in Golden Gate Park for the day.

I am pleased to report that, overall, both boys did very well!

On the plane there, Mikey did a couple of really funny things. He wanted to go right away, of course. I pointed out the other people getting on the plane; he was ok. But once everyone was loaded, he demanded, "GO!" I told him we'd go soon.
Finally the place started moving. "Up!" demanded Mikey.
"Soon," I said, surpressing a laugh. And then the plane picked up speed, and we started our ascent.

"FASTER!" Mikey demanded.

"We're going fast!" I said.

He was good during the trip. JetBlue had TV, and Mom noticed that one channel was Animal Planet, which he watched - mostly without sound. I had to remind him to keep his seat belt on after we landed, but he was good waiting.

The day was not without incident, however. We started pretty well. Mikey does tend to go quickly through things, then repeat them. The Academy had a special exhibit on mammals that he particularly liked. People were let in on an arranged time basis, in small groups - the exhibit was climate controlled. We went through it quickly, and then went on to another controlled climate - tropical (hot and damp!). Mom has friends who live in the Bay area; they joined us for lunch. We had a nice lunch at outside tables, and the boys played in a fenced yard.

After lunch, Mikey wanted to go back to the mammals; we asked him to wait until after we went to the African diorama exhibit and the aquarium. While we were in the aquarium, an emergency alarm sounded and we had to leave the building. Mikey had a total melt-down, screaming and doing the hit-head-bit-heel-of-hand routine that I've described before. One of us went and asked the guard; they thought we would be able to get back in in 15 minutes. [I think it was a fire alarm; the FD came but there was no smoke or fire. We assume it was tripped in error or by malicious intent, but not that there was anything really wrong.]

It was at least an HOUR before we got to go back in. Mikey screamed almost the whole time.

When we went back in, we were able to go back through the mammals and he was fine.

During Mikey's outburst, David got upset and declared the "whole day" was not any fun. (Later, when I asked him, he said it was only the time while Mikey had a tantrum while it was not fun.)

Our return to the airport was not eventful, except the bus was really full. I think it bothered Mom more than the boys. At the airport, there was a small incident with David: there was an "Orange Level" posted terrorist alert. David worries about everything; he started obsessing on what it meant and if he was in danger. Mom talked to him about it, quietly. At one point, the airport made an announcement about the level and the "watch your bags" announcement - I told David that's what "orange" meant.

I asked, "Do you have luggage?"
He replied in the negative. "But you have a backpack?" I continued.
"Yes"
"And are you keeping your backpack close, and you know that no one put anything in it?"
"Yes."
"Then you're OK," I finished. I think it helped.

And so, onto the airplane we went. The trip home was not at all eventful, but there was one thing worth mentioning - as we started our takeoff, Mikey laughed gleefully and clapped his hands - I think he likes takeoffs!

Appreciating Nature

We took the boys to Bolsa Chica Wetlands for a little hike - well, walk. Bolsa Chica is on a migratory path. And we've had lots of rain. And there has been a major effort over the past couple of years to repopulate the wetlands with native plants.

It was a lovely day. The sun was shining. There was a breeze, but not too hard. The sun was out. Many of the native plants were blooming (Southern California is a coastal desert), which does not always happen.

The boys know the way. Mikey kept 10-20 feet ahead of us, but he stayed with us more-or-less. I called him back from time-to-time to look at herons, least terns, or flowers. We saw some lizards, too.

Blue herons nest here, and we saw one! I saw the nest first. Wasn't really expecting a bird, but there it was - just sitting there.

A hawk flew across our path, and hovered overhead for a while. Of course there were sea gulls and pigeons. And ducks.

Then, up in the sky, I saw a big ... JetBlue plane coming in for a landing. "Look, David," I said, pointing to the plane. "Can you see that big bird up there?"

David didn't quite take the bait. "It's an URBAN bird," he replied.

On algebra...

David's been doing very well with Algebra lately. We've been working on graphing parabolas, finding the vertex of a parabola, finding the x-intercepts, etc. Doing well, but it's not always been easy.

After a particularly challenging exercise, and one that he GOT, David declared, "You can't dumb-down algebra." (*smile*)

We are almost done with Algebra I, and will be starting Geometry before too long. His mom tells me she got him a geometry book a while back (one geared to 6th graders) and that he did well with it. I think he'll do well - geometry is literal. Stay tuned.

Pop Goes the Weasel

For some reason, Mikey doesn't like my singing. He loves music - opera, symphony, Thistle and Shamrock are his favorites. My voice isn't recording quality, but I can usually keep a tune. But when I start to sing, Mikey will shake his finger at me and yell, "NO THANK YOU!!!"

So today I was singing,
"All around the cobbler's bench,
"The monkey chased the weasel..."
when he tried to stop me. I did not comply, and then he did the most extraordinary thing - he started moving my arm. I figured it out when he said, "Jack in the Box."

So I crouched down while he pumped my arm, and continued:
"The monkey thought 'twas a-all in fun.
"POP! [big jump inserted here] goes the weasel!"

He let me repeat it with his being the Jack, too!! :-)

It's been a while ...

I can see it's been a while since the last posting. Well, a few things have happened ... I started a new consulting gig. We (hubby and I) went to China. (Harbin .. you can see pics on http://travelsofmarcdonna.shutterfly.com/harbin). We had a visit from 3 of my siblings and took a short trip to Palm Springs, where it was 80 and sunny; the following weekend we took the boys to the snow. I also took Mikey to Disneyland (his Christmas present was a pass) ... so I plead insanity.

Disneyland

This was an experiment for me - I took Mikey alone. I made a BIG story, with the rules. It included details: We will drive to the parking lot. We will park. We will walk to the tram. We will get on the tram and ride to the entrance...

We never tell Mikey in advance that he is going anywhere. For one thing, he has no concept of time. If we were to tell him he was going to Disneyland NEXT WEEK, he would ask for it every minute of every day, and cry and fuss. If we told him, "Grandma will take you TODAY," and anything happened that Grandma could not, it would be unbearable for him. So the school was notified but Mikey was not.

I went to pick Mikey up from school, a little before the school day ended - so I could beat the crowd. When I pulled up at school, he happened to be out in the yard with one of the therapists - he saw me and looked startled. I waved, then parked and went into the office. Did the sign-out thing, then went back out.

The office had called over to get him ready. He marched right up to me, looked me in the eye and said, "I love to go to Disneyland!!"

He was very good and followed the rules, which included going to the bathroom when GRANDMA needed to go, eating and being patient while eating, etc.; and SEVERAL steps before he could actually go on a ride.

This trip, it was several previous favorites (Haunted House, Muppet 3D and Bugs Life) but this time he wanted the Small World attraction - we rode it twice.

Snow!

We have taken Mikey on several "special" trips; David did not make any requests. He's still got some issues around getting outside his comfort zone. But the last time we asked, he said he wanted to go to the snow. Mikey must've heard him, because he asked for snow, too.

Snow Gear

Harbin, China is just south of Siberia. To prepare for that trip, we got snow pants. (We already had pretty decent snow coats, given we seem to end up back East by my family in winter sometimes.) The activity we participate in that took us there also provided coats, pants, heavy gloves, and various other things. So when it came time to go, we had plenty of gear. The only thing I bought was a pair of snow pants for David, who has outgrown Grandpa. He's heavier by at least 25 lbs. and I think the height barrier is about to go ...

Planning the Trip

We debated whether or not to make this a David-only activity; in the end, we decided to take Mikey, too. o I booked a cabin at Big Bear for one night. We also planned to rent a 4WD vehicle - my truck is 4WD but the boys are too big to ride in the back for more than a very short while.

Waiting

Once we had agreed to this adventure - which we did before Christmas - David started asking EVERY weekend, "When will we go to the snow?" At first, we couldn't because there WAS NO SNOW. But finally, the snow came (and came, and came, along with the local rain down here). And of course, I started my new engagement and we had the trip to China.

... and aWAY we GO!

But finally the day came. I picked up the rental vehicle; then we loaded about 40 cubic feet of snow gear into it, and our overnight bags, then we got the boys and off we went. Of course, there was another "story" for Mikey that talked about how long it would take; stopping for lunch; etc.

The boys loved the snow! David plopped and made snow angels. Mikey rode on the saucer down snow - then he just wanted to walk and walk and walk ... we had to limit his walking. Everyone slept well that night, too (the mountains are between 6000' and 7000' where we were). The weather was PERFECT - low 30s, little wind, and the snow pack was deep so even with a little melting there was plenty to play in. The main roads were all clear. At night it dropped below freezing and we had a light dusting of new snow.

The only odd thing happened the following morning - we got up and were out around 8 am (don't ask) playing in an area we had found that we really liked. After about an hour, Mikey said, "May I have home, please?"

We were not ready to go, and David certainly was not ready. We persuaded Mikey to stay on a bit. We did have to go finish packing up (checkout was 11 am). We also found a little zoo up there with a decent aviary (lots of eagles and predators), a bear, fox, beavers, and other local fauna, and Mikey agreed to go. We all enjoyed it, but he did especially.

At any rate, we left a bit earlier than we had planned; drove down the mountain; had lunch; then continued on to home - a good time had by all.

We did decide that if we repeat this exercise next year, we will take 2 vehicles. Grandpa and Mikey will have a short stay and Grandma and David will take the extra time.

Mikey and Foxy

Earlier this week (I was at the boys' house, math tutoring), as I went to leave, Mom said, "Wait! I have something for Aunt Evie." It turns out that Mikey made a likeness of Foxy! in ceramics. He said it was Foxy and it was for Aunt Evie! The likeness was astonishingly good (if I can figure out how to post a pic, I will).

As it happened Evie was on the list of "to-do"s that day. She took off the bubble wrap, her curiosity piqued. I had already explained that it was a gift from Mikey. When she saw it, she gasped, "Foxy? He made FOXY?" and she was near tears. Even the stolid Uncle Jim was impressed.

Tidbits

Mikey says ..

Mikey has limited verbal skills and issues with things like time and tense. He does know his phone number. He will dial the number but does not like to "wait" for ringing and answering, so he'll hand you the phone. If you hand it back, he will hang on.

On the days the boys are with us, we always have one of them call Mom right before we leave to let her know we're on our way. Mikey has learned some patterns: "Hi, How are you." etc. On the call-to-let-Mom-know-we're-on-our-way, he often adds, "Are you coming home?" I think Mom will repeat the question back, and then he'll say, "Yes."

Similarly, when Mom drops them off, there is a "leaving" routine - hugs, and something on the order of, "Bye-bye. I love you. See you tonight." Yesterday, Mikey added, "No smoking!"

Must be something he is learning in school - Mom hasn't for a while and Grandma and Grandpa never did. I don't think any of the aides/therapists do around Mikey (even if they do elsewhere).

In addition to that, Mikey is growing up - there are signs AND he has taken a great deal of interest in anatomy - his, and other people's. Last night, at bath time, he announced, "Shrek has a green [named male anatomy part]." I don't know for sure but my guess is, he's right!

David and Math and Attitude

We still don't know - even though David is much for advanced than Mikey - what really sets him off sometimes. Friday, he was totally Mr. Attitude and didn't want to buckle down to do math. Part of it was there are some hard concepts that are just a struggle for him; part is impatience. Both Mom and I came down pretty hard: She told him that if he didn't fix his attitude, he'd lose both his favorite video game and Mac privileges for the day. And after she went to the store some of it continued until Grandma said, "David, we are going to stay here and do this until it's done, even if it takes hours."

Things improved after a while. I did try to probe what the issues were but David was not able to verbalize them (not sure he could identify them either).

Friday he had an assessment and did reasonably well; Saturday we started new material. If you had seen him Saturday v. Friday, you would have thought you were looking at a different kid. Cooperative, happy and he GOT it. Bunches of stuff. Multiplying monomials, factoring quadratics, perfect squares, etc. It just worked.

After our Saturday session, I create his assignment for the week. He is expected to do some math every day. I had been assigning review items. For a change, I've assigned him NEW pie pieces (ALEKS math program) instead of review. And I think he's going to do just fine with them. There is one that is a bit of a challenge ... we shall see!

Banal

So David was watching on Cartoon Network. He announced to his Mom, "This show is banal and uninteresting." His vocabulary is extraordinary for a 13 year old. The more amusing side of it was the conversation between Grandpa, Grandma and Mom.

"BAY-nal" said Grandpa. Grandma said, "Beh NALL" and Mom said it differently. So then we had to look it up - Dictionary.com says all 3 pronounciations were correct.

Do you understand?

Mikey has difficulty understanding things, and he has a very deliberate idea about what he does and does not want to do. Recently, people at school, apparently, have been asking him, "Do you understand?" Mikey has started to respond to this - with "I don't want, 'Do you understand?'"

Haircut

The boys both have very thick hair and it grows very quickly. Grandpa started taking them (one at a time) to the barbershop. There is a woman there who works with them. Last time Mikey had a haircut, he was good with all the electric clippers - these used to be senory issues for both boys - but this time, when she got close to his ears, Mikey said, "Tickles!!" She had to finish with scissors this time - we'll see what happens next time.

Happy New Year

January 2

We had the boys the first Saturday of the New Year. Although Mom reported a lot of behavior issues the past few days, they were very good for us. (There was a minor and unexplained Mikey-episode at bath time: he didn't want his hair washed.) Mikey and Grandpa did chores at 1:00 p.m., as usual. Grandma and David did math, as usual. David got through 5 pie pieces (in ALEKS)! We normally strive for 2-3 and settle for 1 if it's a really hard lesson. Math is, of course, cummulative. And, per David, "Grandma's explanations are better than ALEK's." (The real difference between Grandma and ALEKS is that Grandma is PRESENT and can see which parts of explanations are not cutting it, and also see what kinds of errors David is making that reveal what he's thinking.)

Many weekends, we take the boys to a local park in the afternoon; sometimes we "go" somewhere like the Aquarium or Zoo. This week, we asked them if they would like to go to Bolsa Chica Wetlands for a hike. They enthusiastically agreed! (You can see pictures of Bolsa Chica on my Shutterfly account, under "Southern California" http://travelsofmarcdonna.shutterfly.com/.)

It was a beautiful day - over 70 F. at our house. We took jackets; Bolsa Chica is next to the ocean and in a breezeway. The hiking is not rigorous - clear paths and very little elevation gain - but it is a migratory path for birds, and they are out in force right now. We saw nesting herons, terns, lots of ducks. Grandma also pointed out a "motorized flying bird"; to which David, once he spotted it, responded, "That's an AIRPLANE!"

Further down the path, where it gets very close to the water, there was a sign that I had Mikey read: "Only birds beyond this point." Grandpa asked the boys if they thought the birds could read the sign.

The other notable moment was when David observed, "This is my first hike of the new decade!"

We went to a local pizza joint for dinner. They boys like going there because a) they do like the food and b) there are video games they can look at. We had the "family dinner" which has salad, pizza and spaghetti. The salad came first. Mikey said, "May I have dinner, please?" We told him, "Salad first, then dinner." I guess he doesn't see salad as a part of dinner.

De-decking the halls

This is not really an autism-related post. Today, I started taking down Christmas. I came from the East Coast, where the changing seasons provided a spiritual cycle to life. Southern California, where I love living, does not provide that same cycle. Life goes on endlessly blending itself from "season" to "season." There is no clear death/cleansing time when the world is purified by the white snow (well, except in the local mountain resorts). Taking down the decorations is the closest thing I get to it here - the end result is bleak and bare, compared to the warmth and festiveness of lights and decorations. I decorate everything downstairs, even the bathroom; and I have an LED/USB Christmas Tree that plugs into my laptop.

As an earlier blog noted, this has been a strange year for me, with Christmas very impacted. But taking down the decorations is also my time of reflection and personal dedication to the new year. This year, it is not as clear as it has been in the past; but I know I am on my way. Changes there will be; older I shall be. Live has a way of leveling and balancing out eventually. "May you live in interesting times" is, IMHO, a curse. I hope this year will hold very few "interesting times."

Cheers and Happy New Year!